1. You're a kiddie model in Slovenia, which is soooooo...
2. So you move to Big Apple and become a hot, sexy model...when you can find the work.
3. Then in 1998 you make a bold move and slip "The Donald" your number...
4. He wants to show you his "dance moves" (BIG mistake girlfriend, HUUUGE mistake!)
(Skip a few major life moments)
5. And you become First Lady!
6. And it starts to sink in... no more New York penthouse, no more ladies who brunch and carefree world travels.
7. You take up a new platform: Bullying. (We hate to say it hunny, but it is not going well.)
8. Then you find out your idiot husband (a.k.a. the literal, real-life president) cheated on you with a pornstar named Stormy.
9. So now you are plotting your way out.
10. But so far this is all you've come up with...